Remember the environment

In the rush to save the banks, the Government seems to have forgotten that we need to save the planet. Fortunately some of us still feel that protecting the environment is nearly as important as protecting our wallet.
I was interested to attend a hustings meeting where people had the chance to question candidates. All the main parties were involved. It was interesting to see that Labour has selected the previous MP’s son to represent them. Keep it in the family, I say.
He explained his party’s pledges to reduce Greenhouse Gas emissions by 30%. Having targets is very eye catching, but has a poor record, and is no sustitute for taking concrete actions. In Kyoto in 1997, the developed nations agreed to a 5% emissions cut by 2012. But by 2007 these emissions had risen by 11%.
In Great Britain it is calculated that around 24,000 people die prematurely from breathing polluted air. We have agreed targets to reduce this. Unfortunately we have not met our targets on Nitrogen Dioxide or Particulates. Not to worry, the American Journal of Epidemiology estimated that victims of air pollution only die 9.8 years early.

Today I was lucky enough to read his exciting election manifesto; the headline, “Fair for All” is full of originality. Perhaps it might have been called “Don’t mention the Deficit”. It is crammed full of wonderful new recycled policies; I was especially impressed by his cunning plan to improve failing hospitals. As we know, hospitals are allowed to be the judge of their own performance, this is quite correct; it would be unfair if an external body was to monitor them. The Supreme Leader’s plan is: if the hospital judges itself not to be successful; it will be taken over by a more successful one. This is similar to Turkeys voting for Christmas, and cannot fail to work.
It was also reassuring to see his pledge that referrals to consultants would take no more than 18 weeks (approximately 4 months). If I were to be ill, I will be very patient and happily wait that length of time; after all, we have been doing so for a number of years.

Identity Cards

He also kept a very tight rein on his Government’s expenditure, diligently avoiding any unnecessary debt. The many billions he poured into the health service for example, have created a very valuable army of managers, who have been worth their weight in gold. It is very satisfying to hear of so many managers earning over £150,000 per annum.
It is astonishing to hear the global financial markets comparing us with spendthrift governments like Greece and Iceland.

His rivals at this election are unable to take the tough decisions he has done. They are suggesting that he cancels his plan for a National Identity Card. Comrade Supreme Leader feels it is well worth borrowing another £10 billion or so, to be able to eavesdrop on his citizens. It is quite wrong to suggest that civil servants could lose peoples’ private details, that has never happened. As a precaution he believes that our private details such as medical records, tax records, political activities and credit histories should be kept in a central database. At present they are kept in all sorts of separate files and that makes it difficult for fraudsters and private companies to access them.

Humble origins

Our dearly departed Leader was the pin up boy for New Labour; fêted by the party as a future First Minister. One of his last engagements was a meeting with Comrade Supreme Leader Brown. We will never know what passed between them, but shortly after, he announced his resignation.
Our comrade Supreme Leader Brown is, as we all know, of very humble origins. Brought up in a miner’s cottage, the family of six slept in one bedroom. As they had no running water, they took turns to bathe in a nearby river. There is a Tory smear which says he injured his eye in a rugby match; we all know he would never have played such a decadent upper class game. Actually his injury was sustained saving the life of an injured miner after an accident in the pit. There are further scurrilous Tory accusations that he attended University and was parachuted into a safe Labour seat.

Of course, our comrade Supreme Leader has been financially astute. He very cleverly spotted the bottom of the gold market and sold the country’s gold reserves at that time. During my career in the financial markets I now recognise my wrong thinking. I have in some cases bought shares at low prices and sold them at a profit.
He also, very cleverly, set up a new system for monitoring the banking industry, and we owe him a huge debt for that. Due to his careful scrutiny, they did not get involved in any hanky panky. As Chancellor of the Exchequer, he abolished boom and bust, and in no sense was he responsible for the reckless lending of some banks. If two Scottish banks over extended themselves and lent money to all and sundry, can he be held accountable? That was the fault of the Americans, with whom we have a special relationship.

This is the type of person that the dearly departed Leader had rewarded with positions of responsibility throughout Glasgow. His largesse was also extended to key players in the opposition; he wasn’t stupid, he realised that it was in his interest to keep them on side. The leader of the Liberal Democrats, was created Chair of the body who monitors these quangos. The glorious ex-Leader has been repaid by the support of the Liberal Democrats in preventing an investigation into the whole affair. It appears that the leader of the official opposition, the SNP, was also sitting on one of the boards.

Glasgow has the title of the unhealthiest city in Britain; we can expect to live many years less than anyone else in the country. The Council tried to blame the ills on poverty and deprivation, but that has not stood up to scrutiny. The poor life expectancy travels through all social classes. If we are honest with ourselves we can perhaps see some of the problems. We drink too much, do too little exercise and are not really interested in the pollution we are causing. When I raised the issue of Glasgow’s poor air quality, other councillors fell about laughing.

We saw what happens when these colleagues are put in charge. There was a Labour councillor running the body in charge of public transport. I remember him well from my time in the Council. He came to speak at a conference in Dundee. Myself and my colleagues travelled by train; Dundee is well linked with public transport. He took his car, and I asked him if as a representative of the public transport industry, he ought to set an example and use it. Well, he told me he didn’t go in for gesture politics.
At any rate, it appears that his co-directors had a jolly good time, jetting off around the globe, staying in luxury hotels and even attending a football cup final These trips were presumably for the purpose of seing how other cities run their public transport systems, and to learn lessons from this.

Oh how the mighty have fallen. The one time golden boy of the Labour Party has crashed and burned. In his wake he has exposed a tangled web private businesses running council services.
In my previous book I touched on the regimented nature of the political groups of the Council. What I underestimated was the magnificent system of patronage designed by the dearly departed Leader. Towards the end of my time in office, there was a rush to privatise Council departments. Culture & Leisure and a rash of other departments were removed from Council control and arms length companies were created to run them.
I was slightly bewildered; here was a Labour politician taking public sector departments into private ownership; even Margaret Thatcher would have been proud of him. I found myself, a businessman, in the position of rebel against the so-called left wing Labour Party.
From the outside this could look like jobs for the boys (and girls). By giving his colleagues well paid positions on the boards of these companies, he could ensure loyalty.